McDonald’s McRib Examined by Chemist – It is Made of People!

October 25, 2011

In what can only be the biggest revelation about McDonald’s food since the McNugget was found to contain Chernobyl Chicken, scientists today announced that the tasty sandwich the McRib is actually made of left over humans.

“It’s shocking really, why are all these human parts going into food?” said scientist Camille LeCamille, “I would have thought we could reuse them for another purpose, or even burry them, if that’s your thing”.

The human parts were farmed from human parts grower ExtraLimbs in Whiskey Creek Montana. ExtraLimbs is in the business of growing spare human arms, legs, and yes, ribs, for scientific study and even transplant into living people.

“We are doing good work here.” President and CEO of ExtraLimbs Michael Douglas said. “You can’t let a few  bad ribs spoil the garden. Not this time. No Sir! No this time. It happened to Adam, it will not happen to ExtraLimbs,” said Douglas, clearly referring to Adam from the Garden of Eden.

When asked what Douglas meant, Adam from the Garden of Eden had this to say, “Look, I’ve been out of the loop on people business for like 6000 years here. I don’t know what you people are up to. Though, if I had the choice of using that extra rib of mine to make a McRib sandwich or a Woman, could have been a different outcome.”

McDonald’s could not be reached for comment. When our own intrepid reporter Sarah Uberhotchickstein questioned employees at the local Mcd’s she was turned away. “They really are tight lipped on this one. I couldn’t even get a free fry,” said Sarah.

 

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